Thursday, July 06, 2006

Unbelievable


Sometimes the stupidity of studies that scientists do blows my mind. One time I heard of a study funded by the government that measured the amount of methane generated by cow patties to see if it was harmful. I always wondered what they’d do if it was.

I came across another one this week titled, “Mindless Reading Seen as Fundamental.” The gist of it is that if you zone out while you read you won’t have as much comprehension as if you pay attention. No way!! I can’t believe the people who did this actually get paid to be professors. So in honor of all stupid studies here are my top 5 studies I’d like to see done.

5. Is it more difficult to peel potatoes while a person is sleeping than when they are awake?
4. If someone is offered a dill pickle or a $50, which one is taken most often (and I’m talking the big ‘ol dill pickles they have at a skating rink or state fair)?
3. Can God make a person so big he can’t move her?
2. What’s really in the butter at the movie theater?
1. If I was an ant would my name be Buster?

2 comments:

Ryan 1 said...

True story...When I worked at the theater in Huntington, we switched to real butter for a few months. Unfortunately people complained that our butter did not taste buttery enough, so we switched back to the fake butter with 684 ingredients. The people were happy again.

Jon the legal immigrant said...

Would you like us to call you Buster?